Amalgamation of Life, Director

When a friend tells you no

In able to be selected to direct a show next season, I was tasked with developing a strategy, vision, and team that would lead me to success. How would I accomplish that, who would I turn to in my hour of need?

A bit dramatic but it’s me and this is a blog dedicated to the dramatics – what else am I supposed to do (and how am I supposed to say it?!).

I had a tier system – who would work best with who and on what schedule. I had six options provided by the theatre but since I refuse to risk snowfall, that narrows the options down to four (or five, if Farmer’s Almanac is to be believed upon release – which I don’t because I am a cautious individual). Anyway, I sent everyone an initial reach out email. I considered those whom to be a part of my team and wanted to gauge interest if people would want to work with me. Again, as a cautious individual: I could’ve been misreading our relationship, right? And I didn’t want to wait until show opening to find out I didn’t have a Costumer or Tech Director.

The email was well received and I got excited upon a few initial return emails. I was starting to form a real team, a group of individuals I knew I could count and depend on. But it wasn’t all easy. I hit one speed bump and I won’t lie, it hurt a little bit.

I asked one of my best friends to choreograph for me. She said no. I couldn’t stop myself from being hurt. I couldn’t even explain why it hurt me. Is it because I’m not used to people saying no to me? If you saw how many jobs I had applied before my recent career change, you would know that I am used to that. It was hard removing my personal feelings from this professional setting. She doesn’t like the show. She wouldn’t be able to put in the best effort due to her distaste for it and how could I blame her for it?

Well I don’t. I had a talk with our mutual friend and I let it go. It was and is fine. Why would I want someone on my team who wasn’t 100% for my vision and enjoying themselves while working with me? Especially if I want her to work on my team in the future. Especially because I want her to work on my team in the future. I’m not going to risk my friendship for a professional opportunity in a community theatre – she’s a multi talented individual and I can’t wait to work with her in the future. It won’t be this show but maybe my next show.

I still love her. She still loves me. And she’s probably going to help me in someway, we just don’t know what it looks like–outside her normal mental and emotional support she provides anyway, is what I mean. ‘Til next time.

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